words of audacity

portrait d'une femme, affiche d'une fille.

Mon, 22 Jan 2007 21:43:48 GMT

je déteste dormir sans une présence
les surprises semblent alléger ma solitude
alors je ramène quelqu'un dans mon lit
afin de découvrir comment je me sens
comme un bébé
portrait d'une femme
affiche d'une fille
portrait d'une femme
affiche d'une fille

me satisfaire
eviter les novices
ceux qui cherchent à me faire taire
jusqu'à ce que je rentre avec l'un d'eux
car je connais la sensation
de chercher le fil d'or
et de ne jamais le trouver
coming in your pants
qui ne pense qu'à coucher avec une
fille d'affiche
affiche d'une fille
une fille d'affiche
portrait d'une femme
affiche d'une fille

tu sais que tu n'aimes pas ta réalité
je sais que tu n'aimes pas ta réalité
on ne peut pas fabriquer la vérité
je sais que tu n'aimes pas ta réalité
tu sais que tu n'aimes pas ta réalité

pizza

Fri, 05 Jan 2007 22:44:53 GMT

hail satan.

new year's eve, 2006 -- a first and a last.

Thu, 04 Jan 2007 04:37:32 GMT

worked at the elk's lodge new years party from 7:30 to 11:30 with a bunch of people i really dont give a fuck about, for a bunch of people who i really dont give a fuck about. made $10/hr. couldn't say no.

played an 11:45 (pm) show at landmark books. had to make multiple trips home to retrieve an extra amp, then an amp cable, and as midnight rolled around the only people in the store were the other two performers, their families, and a handful of close friends -- a very inibriated krista, anthony, some azn kid, and diane (for like 10 minutes). the 9v that powered the pickup in the acoustic i was using was dead, so anthony made a run down to sev to get another.

it was a very well-received show, by those who were there to receive it.
so is life, i guess.
i had a blast.

though i must say, it was a very fitting end to the worst year of my life -- up until its dying minutes.

after the show, i bummed some cigs off of julia and stopped by ashley's new years fête.
we didn't want to risk ringing her doorbell at 2:30, so i decided it would be more condusive to scream her name at her open window. when she failed to answer to "ashley", i was compelled to scream "stellaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa" at the top of my lungs.

the lot of them came barreling down the hallway and let us in, and i was greeted by my favourite ex (who was pretty toasted) saying "...people just keep handing me their coronas..."
we went in and i proceeded to drink two beers, which went straight to my head (lol lightweight), and left me crying alone on my bedroom floor 2 hours later, missing the aforementioned ex.
happy new years, everybody.
this is why i don't drink.

prior to my drunken pity party, jeanne and i watched a good deal of the twilight zone marathon, until about 4:30 am.
the twilight zone fucking rules.

i will post my yearly recap sometime this week, because i need to write it out.

slack motherfucker.

Sat, 30 Dec 2006 04:24:45 GMT

"and i,"
said the bachelor to the bride,
"am not waiting for tonight,
no, i
will box your ears and
leave you here,
stripped bare."

it's a dead man's party.

Tue, 12 Dec 2006 01:39:55 GMT

mother's big xmas gift-swap was on friday night.
my next-door neighbor is a creep.
i have a girlfriend who i never see.

hello. i'm ryan arnold and i really really really fucking hate the holidays.

hannah got "The Warning" last week.
for those of you who don't know, "The Warning" is given to any girl who is interested in me, by an elite few who i like to call the "Fuck Ryan Task Force" (or FRTF, for short -- "fur-tiff").
"The Warning" primarily states that i am a walking bag of haz-mat, and i am to be regarded as such.
ladies, this is a hard-hat zone. hard-hats must be worn at all times.

now, this group of indiviuals is rather unorganized and unprofessional.
i almost feel bad for them.
like i should help them out -- type up some literature that they can hand out, make some flyers /bumper stickers/pins, help them sell ribbons to fundraise (or a bake sale).
hell, maybe i can even set up a grant foundation and scholarships.

anyway, one of them is reading this because she is creepy and likes to read my livejournal.
i'm still on her "friends list," so i can see her write about me all the time. and this entry is public for her.
hello, you mysterious stranger.

br00tal.

Sun, 19 Nov 2006 05:03:47 GMT

je n'ai rien d'aucun intérêt effectif ou importance d'écrire environ.

la vie est aussi douce et médiocre que toujours.

excepté un petit changement : il y a une fille.
j'ai des sentiments pour elle, quoiqu'elle soit prise.

je possède détester plutôt creux pour le spyware installé sur mon ordinateur.
...pas que j'ai n'importe quoi contre la lesbienne chaude et à peine juridique Co-eds.

in this iconoclast's humble opinion, the best part of high school is that there is no possible way that you cannot come into contact with your ex on a daily basis. the awkward exchanges of hellos and heys, the discommodious waves and smiles. i hate it.

et telle est la vie.
smell ya later.
shag ass.
----------
poetry:

the club bumps
faded off Remy and five blunts
codiac cush got me fucked up
i'm goin' round for round, drink dark brown
smoke trees in a leaf that be dark brown
look at baby, so thick man, she dark brown
bad bitches all around, you know it's goin' down
i be posted at the bar like a ghetto C.E.O
spank T with a new jean suit from ????
spank white nikes... so fresh and so tight
the bitches wanna holla back, young and all night
so what do you expect when i'm out wit my niggaz
drink it up, smoke blunts, poppin' bitches

bitch i dont give a fuck bitch.

in a safe place.

Mon, 30 Oct 2006 05:16:26 GMT

i think that this is the perfect metaphor for my love life.

doo doo doo

Tue, 29 Aug 2006 20:55:40 GMT

friends-only from now on.
comment to be added.
or suck my cock.
^_^.

that is all.
-h.

"the best love poem i can write at the moment."

Fri, 25 Aug 2006 05:38:55 GMT

listen, I told her
why don't you stick your tongue up my ass

no, she said.

well, I said
if I stick my tongue up your ass first
then will you stick your tongue up my ass?

all right, she said.

I got my head down there and looked around
opened a section
then my tongue moved forward

not there, she said
ahhahahaha
not there, that's not the right place

you women have more holes than swiss cheese
I don't want you to do it
why?

well, then I'll have to do it back
and then at the next party you'll tell people
I licked your ass with my tongue

suppose I promise not to tell?

you'll get drunk, you'll tell

o.k., I said
roll over
and I'll stick it in the other place

she rolled over
and I stuck my tongue in that other place

we were in love

we were in love except withwhat I said at parties
and we were not in love
with each others ass holes

she wants me to write a love poem
but I think if people can't love each others ass holes
and farts
and shits
and terrible parts
just like they love the good parts
that ain't complete love

so, as far as love goes
as far as we have gone
this poem will have to do.
-Charles Bukowski.

you. read this now.

Fri, 25 Aug 2006 03:28:11 GMT

okay. this is fucking crazy as balls.

you. yeah, you. you're probably not reading this, because you don't have internet (i don't think), and you probably have better things to do that fucking read some asshole's livejournal.

but you need to stop dispairing.
getting totally fucked up won't make time stop moving. summer is almost over, and nothing can keep what's ahead away.

i'm sorry if this is harsh, but you need to hear it.

yeah, your shit is pretty fucked at the moment.
you've kind of been dealt the shitty end of the stick, and it sucks.
but you've been presented with a choice -- are you going to rise above the crap hand you've been delt, or are you going to fucking crumble and go get wayst3d?

i told you a while ago, and i told you again just now -- drinking is for 3 types of people: little red-headed scenesters at teen night, backstabbing best friends, and my dad.
you are none of those.

so.
what the fuck are you doing?

and yes. we need to hang out some time soon.
like, call me.
dewd.

asdfsaldkfjdaf.

twee as fuck.

Thu, 24 Aug 2006 04:12:21 GMT

what is a promise? can you hold it? how much does it weigh?

D.A.R.E is a failed program. we all promised Darron the DARE Lion that we would all repeat Nancy Regan's mantra ad nauseum -- "just say no" -- and in return, Darron promised us asylum in the knowledge that not all of our peers were actually doing drugs/drinking alcohol/smoking cigarettes -- it just seemed that way to our uneducated, naive, prepubescent minds.

well, i'm here to tell you that Darron lied to your mother fucking face.
anybody who's actually ever been to high school knows that every public school in America is a fucking half-way house. and that, no matter the promises you make to yourselves in childhood, once you face up against that harrowing dragon that is Peer Pressure you are going to crumble like fucking stale-ass bread.

albert camus (remember him? of course you don't.) wrote "what is a rebel? a man who says 'no'."
i am that man -- i am a rebel because i say "no" when everyone around me says "yes." i am a rebel because i dare to stand for something, to demand something more from life than what was promised me -- a 2-story in suburbia and a job i hate.

i am a rebel, and i want to know: where the fuck is the rebellion at?

life

Mon, 21 Aug 2006 06:52:03 GMT

is amazing.

i am in love.

top 10 worst lyrics on interpol's "turn on the bright lights"

Fri, 18 Aug 2006 15:14:02 GMT

uggghhhhhh.
i love interpol, but...
omfg.

source

10. "I wish I could eat the salt off your lost faded lips" (“Obstacle 1”)
In the first of lyricist Paul Bank’s many stabs at some semblance of romanticism, this is among the worst flops—plus, he should be licking the salt off of said lost faded lips, not eating it. No one eats salt.

9. “"I'm gonna pull you in close / Gonna wrap you up tight / Gonna play with the braids that you came here with tonight" (“Obstacle 2”)
Banks tries to sound like a sexual predator of some sort? I mean, I guess promises/threats to “pull you in close” and “wrap you up tight” might be kinda sexy, but playing “with the braids that you came here with tonight” gets Banks no points. Girls are sensitive about these sorts of things.

8. “She says brief things, her love’s a pony, my love's subliminal" (“Leif Erikson”)
On their own, none of these lyrics would be too terrible—well, of course, except for the pony one—but when combined, they’re a classic Banks dud. “She says brief things”—ok, I guess that could be considered nice. “Her love’s a pony”—uh, I guess everyone likes ponies. “My love’s subliminal”—oh, OK. That explains everything.

7. "This is a contest, this is a bracelet, this isn't no intervention" (“Say Hello to the Angels”)
Well, I must admit I’d be lying if I said I didn’t have my heart set on some sort of intervention, but I guess I’ll settle for the contest and bracelet.

6. “"Well she was my catatonic sex toy love-joy diver" (“Stella Was a Diver and She Was Always Down”)
Halfway through the most incredibly heart-rendering scuba diver love song this side of The Sounds of the Sounds of Science comes this lamentation—a deeply felt ode to Stella, Paul Banks’s “catatonic sex toy love-joy diver”. Now catatonia was never too much of a priority for me in life partners, but maybe Stella was just that good a sex toy.

5. “Because friends don't waste wine when there's words to sell" (“Obstacle 2”)
No kidding? Huh.

4. “The subway, she is a porno" (“NYC”)
It’s not the (admittedly awkward) subway / porno comparison that upsets me about this one, it’s the reference to the subway as a “she”. This sort of thing should be reserved for sea captains’ ships and military dudes’ AK-47s. Banks is just being way too presumptuous here.

3. "Her stories are boring and stuff / She’s always calling my bluff” (“Obstacle 1”)
“Obstacle 1” hurts me deeply, because it would be such a great song without lines like this one. Perhaps the most obviously forced rhyme in indie rock history, the use of the “and stuff” filler phrase still stuns just as much today as it did two years ago. If it wasn’t for the fact that the “she’s always calling my bluff” line is kind of cool, this would certainly be the worst line on the album. What were you thinking, man??

2. “My best friend's a butcher, he has sixteen knives / He carries them all over the town at least he tries / Oh look it stopped snowing" (“Roland”)
The first line to “Roland” isn’t so bad I guess—some silly lines about a butcher friend of Banks, who sort of kind of maybe tries to set Roland up as a working class hero figure with that “he carries them all over town / at least he tries” line. But then, for some reason, he gets distracted by the weather and remarks upon how it has stopped snowing. It’s like Banks was in the studio singing “Roland”, and upon reaching the end of the line, glanced out the window and was so stunned by the fact that it had stopped snowing (?), that he had to remark upon it in song, forgetting that the mic was still on. I can just picture the producer later realizing it was still in the song and going to cut it out, but Banks interrupting him, saying “no, leave it. It’s natural.”

1. “"I feel like love is in the kitchen with a culinary eye / I think he's making something special and I'm smart enough to try" (“Obstacle 2”)
Oh man, is this one a monster. Once again Banks tries his hand at romanticism with doomed results, bizarrely personifying love as a chef “with a culinary eye”. This surreal loverman act of Banks’s (“I feel he’s making something special and I’m smart enough to try”—sexy!) makes this line the worst one in a song full of throwaway lines. And what’s more, it appears to have become the sort of precedent for a new batch of romantic atrocities in the form of Interpol’s second album, Antics, with lines like “you make me want to pick up my guitar / and celebrate the myriad ways that I love you”. Well, Mr. Banks, you’ve certainly left us with quite a few here.

MOTHER FUCKING CHRISTMAS

Fri, 18 Aug 2006 13:45:30 GMT

OMGWTF CRANE WIFE LEAK!!!!!

http://rapidshare.de/files/29564842/The_Crane_Wife.rar.html

THIS IS SOME MOTHER FUCKING CHRISTMAS IN AUGUST SHIT!

twloha.

Thu, 17 Aug 2006 03:31:16 GMT

weird and awkward.

Wed, 16 Aug 2006 18:50:00 GMT

so kaylyn and i came to the conclusion today that i am weird, nervous and awkward, but i shouldn't be nervous about being nervous.
or something.

i think i just have standard "nice guy syndrome."
i'll figure it out.

anyway, kate was over last night and we watched V for Vendetta and made pillow forts and talked about stuff.
all we ever do is sit around at my house and watch movies. i hope she doesnt get bored of me..

-----------

i'm being bound and gagged and dragged to go see The Devil Wears Prada tonight at bradly at 7:00.
save me.

text me if you know my number.
i'm begging you.

-----------

yesterday i finished my summer work for my elec. comm. class (read: a music video), and handed it in to the teacher this morning.
the music video came out pretty fucking sweet, if i do say so myself.
and i do.
i do say so.

it is on youtube (link) for your massivly orgasmic viewing pleasure.
or something.

i hate

Mon, 14 Aug 2006 23:15:04 GMT

hospitals.

i've been in one for the better part of the past 2 days -- we took spencer to the emergency room at around 11 yesterday, because of the continual stomach cramping and vomiting that he had been experiencing for the prior 9 days.

so they took him, and after a few hours spent in medical limbo, they admitted him and gave him a room. i spent the night at my aunt's house.
which was...
well..
yeah.

then i was back there early this morning, up until we were discharged around 6:00.

kate maybe is coming over tonight. i hope. <3
----------
i wrote new songs last night, the first in a while. and one of them was one that i had been trying to write for a very long time, about something that effected me deeply. so i feel better.
i think being in the hospital gave me the... perspective, say? to write that song in particular.

they're here.

let me know what you think.
-h.

Fri, 11 Aug 2006 01:22:40 GMT

for your reading (non)pleasure

1. Leave me a comment saying, "Interview me."
2. I will respond by asking you five questions. I get to pick the questions.
3. You will update your journal with the answers to the questions.
4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.
--------------
these are from sami:

1) If two wrongs don't make a right, why the fuck does New Jersey have jughandles?
i was going to come up with a delightfully smart-ass answer for this, but i don't have one. i have no clue why the fuck dirty jerz has jughandles, but i hate hate hate hate them.

2) What do you think you should have been named (What name best suits you).
i should have been named something distinctly more... parisian.

3. If you could meet any musician, dead or alive, and ask them something, who would you meet and what would you ask?
i would want to meet conor oberst, and ask him how he can write such beautiful music and yet be such a complete bitch.

4. Is Elvis dead?
yes.

5. Which two people would you most want to put in a cage match to the death?
jesus christ and allah, just so we can settle this jihad shit for certain.
or, me and ann coulter. bitch would take an asspie to her face.
--------------
these are from ben:

1. How often do you think about me?
whenever i stub my toe, drop my books, spill soda, or walk into a shelf, i like to think that you're sitting somewhere, laughing.

2. Right now, as of this moment, what do you want to do with your life?
sing my songs of love, decadence, and wanton rebellion.

3. Love or money?
money. you can buy love with money. duhhhh.
(kidding.)

4. If I were an icecream cone, how would you eat me?
i'm vegan. i wouldn't eat you.

5. What is the number one reason you hate your town?
i have a feeling you hand-picked this question for me.
i mostly hate this fucking town because you aren't here, ben, and because geek diffusion hasn't diffused you over to this side of the cell that is the hudson river. : (

The Best Day Ever (an essay with full-color pictures)

Wed, 09 Aug 2006 07:46:33 GMT

the entire evening started with the seemingly intelligent decision on our part to drive to red bank, instead of taking the train.
we figured that, this way, we weren't going to be enslaved to the new jersey transit schedule, forced to obey the dystopian law that is the 11:59 pm southbound express.

one groovy mix tape later, we arrive in downtown red bank, in dire need of a parking spot.
so we continued along broad st. -- out onto front st. -- past the park where the movie was being shown -- where about 1500 fans had already amassed -- and... then proceeded to leave red bank, on highway 35.

it was somewhere around little silver that kate realized something was awry, and we then attempted to locate somewhere to turn her car around. we decided on a hep driveway, where kate's truck decided that the stress of the day's journey was too much, and stalled.
luckily, it turned back on, and we turned back around, and proceeded back into red bank.

we ended up driving all the way to the other side of the red bank train station, parking in the "latino" district.

'nuff said.

note here that we failed to note where kate parked her car.
---------
45 minutes later, we have stumbled up and down nearly every street in red bank, attempting to find our way out of the boondocks and onto broad st. -- and then hopefully into marina park.
which we do.

only, we go to the wrong park.

so we check, make our phone calls, act suspicious, etc. and follow a conspicuous steam of patrons down a conspicuous-looking alley to find ourselves immersed in fandom -- surely, this was the right place.

only, they were out of wristbands. admission had closed.
we were fuqqed to the 10th power.

luckily cait, kate, and mike were all there, near the back of the fence, and we talked and plotted our... well, not a "gunpowder plot", per say, but definitely a plot to overthrow the guard systems and make our way into the free movie. for free.

we succeeded in rallying a few of the other disgruntled potheads/weedites/slackers/fanboys into cementing our emotions of abandonment and disappointment into a fighting force. kate even lifted said fence segment and instructed us to crawl under!

...when we were then detected by the omnipotent watchforce that is Staff Security. the rent-a-loser came over and ordered us to cease and desist our subversive activities, lest we be "ejected from the event."

a consequence which, as i later pointed out, made no sense -- seeing as how we had never been admitted to the event to begin with.

our fists raised in the air, our spirits not to be crushed, we regrouped on both sides of the fence -- still under the ever-vigilant eye of the po-po.

okay, so cait and kate gave kate and me their wristbands, upon their departure 2/3 through the Q&A session.
so we went in and met up with mike roig, went up to the front of the crowd, took pictures of kevin smith, laughed, watched people smoke joints and drink carpisun juice packs, and then finally bid dear mike goodbye.
kate and i sat and watched clerks, in its entirety, especially relishing when the screen collapsed at the beginning.

the evening, though off to a "ruff" start, was going swimmingly.
---------
but that was only half of the adventure.

we soon realized, as we followed the dispursing crowd back to broad st., that we had no fucking clue where kate's truck was.
not a clue.

so we did what any sensible person would do in such a situation -- we went to 7-11 and bought green tea and a chipwich.
the green tea seemed to help our predicament, except for the brief instant where kate tripped and sent tea flowing fourth from her nose.

we walked in a large circle, returning back to the same 7-11 we departed from, and decided that, yes, we had turned the wrong way coming out of the door.
so we we the other way, and finally came to the train station of lore.

and we welk down the wrong street -- an event which, in all honsety, was in no way out of place in our night. retracing our footsteps, we made it back to the train station.

on looking for her car:
kate: "okay. well, either it's..."
me: "your car is right there." /point/
kate: "ah. i was about to say that."
me: "yeah."
kate: "i own3d you."
me: "yeah. -_-"
---------
and this, boys and girls, is where the real adventure begins.
we walk past a group of none-too-friendly-looking latinos who were hanging out on their porch, glaring at us, and get into kate's car.

kate puts the keys in the ignition, and turns them.
the car starts.
she puts the car in gear.
she presses down on the accellerator.

the car does not move.
the car, instead, begins to slowly roll backward.

with a huge lurch, the gears shift and the car leaps into gear, shooting forward 3 feet and proceeding to crawl down the street, refusing to move about 10 mph.

this, friends, was no good. there was no way that we could drive on the parkway at 25 mph, max.

so we pulled off to the side of the road, and made phone calls, sent text messages, checked street signs, et cetera, and finally decide that we're to take the 11:59 train home.
upon persuading kate's friend jessica not to drive all the way up to red bank to pick us up, we walked up onto the platform and waited for our train to arrive.

we boarded said train, and road it home.
and so ended the greatest day ever.
---------
now, for you really dedicated fans, we have some full-color photographs, presented by www.hirosarc.com:

"i hate people, but i love gatherings. isn't it ironic?"

the one and only mike roig.

the collapsing screen.

exhausted in the station.

the wrong side of the fucking fence.

kevin smith himself.

ryan: "i vote we go this way!"
kate: "no, this way seems more condusive to finding the car!"

ryan: "i vote we go this way!"
kate: "bitch, shut the fuck up."

exhausted after a hard day of adventuring.
---------
anyway. i'm off to sleep.
goodnight, world.

a time to be so small.

Mon, 07 Aug 2006 19:38:17 GMT

i've had a wonderful past few days -- specifically saturday.
i was under the impression that i wasn't going to be able to see kate at all, but things shifted for the better and we ended up going to the fair.

where we actually went on rides this time.

i made her another mix tape. which is like, 4929405933 better than the first one. : )

-----------

tomorrow i'm heading into red bank with steve, with the intention of meeting up with mike roig. then, at 7:30 in marine park, there's a free showing of Clerks. kevin smith will be there. i will meet him.
kate will come along too. : )

pictures will ensue, because clerks ftw.

-----------

in other news: i present to you -- denizens of these vast internets -- the "i hate ryan arnold" manifesto. link.

will fonda is fucking cool as all hell. \m/

i'm going to work.
later.

ugh.

Sat, 05 Aug 2006 04:33:46 GMT

i miss kate.

cigarettes & red vines.

Fri, 04 Aug 2006 23:18:49 GMT

today, i discovered that my internet hosting automatically renewed itself, extending my subscription for another year.
so i'm trying to figure out what kind of a site i want to have.
or rather, what i want to have on my site.

more on this as it progresses.

---------

kate was supposed to come over tonight to watch V, but it currently looks like that isn't going to pan out. so i've got nothing to do tonight.
hooray for hanging out with your mom.
\m/

---------

i'm going to go start coding this totally kllr website d00d.
rock on.
-h.

how strange, love.

Thu, 03 Aug 2006 04:55:17 GMT

today was... an amazing day.

i went to the fair with kate. this was, as it was promised to be, amazing. we went to the diner afterward.

this afternoon, i went to red bank, where i proceeded to fix my 12-string martin acoustic, buya "Clerks." bumper sticker (ftw), and pick up megatokyo vol. 4 and v for vendetta on dvd.

the fair was fun. i have a bit of a problem going on rides, but i rode the Zipper -- a ferris wheel on crack -- with kate. it was notably the only ride we went on, but it was still worth it.
i saw a lot of people i knew while i was there, which tends to happen every year. usually i stand around and hope in vain that they don't notice me, and thusly dont come over and start to make obligatory small-talk about how my summer is going, but they usually do.
tonight, though, it only happened once.
with kyle.

the "i fucking hate ryan arnold!" fanclub was there, mind you, with 2 out of its staggaring 4 alleged members. they didn't notice me, though, probably deliberately.
which was for the better.

anyway... <3
work tomorrow.
-h.

the 'sisyphus' of morons.

Wed, 02 Aug 2006 06:07:20 GMT

i fucking hate ann coulter.

i want a fucking t-shirt that has this fucking picture on it:

and underneath, it will say
"ANN COULTER MUST PIE!"

red bank tomorrow.
wooo.
and then the fair, with kate.
adoration, rapture, jubilance.

count cockula.

Tue, 01 Aug 2006 17:12:46 GMT

"come august, we like to celebrate SAINT SUCK-MY-BIG-FAT-FUCKING-SAUSAGE!"
-tom cruise as "frank t.j. mackey", in the 1999 film Magnolia

i downloaded Clerks 2. it's sitting as a .avi file on my hard drive. i've waited 2 years for this movie. and now i have it.

but i have to do school work first.

this is the greatest excersize in personal restraint that i have faced in the past 4 years of my life.

fuck.
---------------
i called the guidance dept. of my school this morning. and it was exciting.

it's fucking hot outside. 100-something degrees today.
ughh.
---------------
fireman's fair tonight, i think.
with kate, kaylyn, and maybe bobby.
but mostly with kate <3.